The Goins Family (pronounced "go-ins") is the eleventh episode of Season 3 of the American Supernanny show.
Episode summary[]
Jo visits The Goins Family in Salt Lake City, Utah where Jay (30) and Karolee (29) have three children: 6-year-old Khalin, 5 year old Kolben, and 2 year old Kadance.
Their oldest son, Khalin, who has attention deficit hyperactive disorder has a hard time behaving in school and completing his homework, and is physically and verbally aggressive (Talking about Commiting Suicide Once) and tends to lash out violently at his parents. Kolben is mischievous and Kadence is starting to pick up her older brothers' bad behavior. The kids also tend to snack a lot throughout the day without permission.
Karolee is stressed out and struggling to control her children. Meanwhile, father Jay spends more time resting after his job rather than helping his wife with disciplining the kids. With Karolee pregnant with her fourth child, she needs Jay's help more than ever.
Can Jo help Karolee understand Khalin's ADHD? Can she help Jay get more involved in parenting, help get the kids under control, and relive his pregnant wife?
Episode Recap[]
Observation[]
Karolee reveals that she is once again pregnant to Jo, and reveals a new room for a baby. The kids begin to play up over snacks, trying to grab their mom's attention, Kahlin and his ADHD kicked into gear, leading to an aggressive confrontation between him and his mother. Jo reveals to the audience that research shows that in an average classroom, at least one kid has ADHD. Karolee puts Kahlin in her version of a naughty bench timeout, but it turns into a battle and Jo thinks she is being too confrontational with Kahlin, considering his ADHD. Karolee doesn't know how to help Kahlin and reveals that he has been on and off medication but doesn't know how to improve his behavior, noting that it has gotten worse and she doesn't know what to do.
After noon, a trip to the park helps to lighten things up, but Jo senses that Karolee is off. Karolee explains that she struggles with parenting because she feels she is falling to parent correctly. She wants to enjoy her kids, but its been too stressful for her to enjoy being a mother. Jo is glad she reached out to help.
Kahlin and Karolee begin to fight once again, this time over homework. Karolee dreads this part of the day. Jo explains that homework is difficult for children with ADHD because it requires them to concentrate. The battle between Kahlin and Karolee goes on for around an hour, and Jay arrives.
However, Jay goes upstairs and rests for 45 minutes, leaving Karolee to continue to parent alone. Jay explains that he comes down when he's hungry and fails to defend why he was upstairs, trying to make light of the situation. Jo is annoyed with Jay's actions and can tell that Karolee is exhausted. Jay fails to help around the house even after going downstairs.
Jo leaves when she sees Karolee brushing Kahlin's teeth.
Parent Meeting[]
Jo sees a lack of maturity in both parents. Jo mentions Jay's time upstairs alone, and Jay sees it as a time to unwind, and Jo calls him selfish. Jo says that Jay has a pregnant wife dealing with motherhood. Jo asks Jay to look at Karolee, and asks Karolee to speak Jay truthfully and honestly. Jo explains that Kahlin's ADHD doesn't change who he wants to be, but because he cannot control himself because of the condition. Jo asks the parents to recognize how to make life better for Kahlin. Jo says that Karolee needs to be able to look after himself, with the support of her husband. Jay says that Jo calling him selfish was hard to hear. Jo wants them to be accountable parents who are willing to change their situation if they decide to do so.
Teaching[]
Jo wants to let Karolee know how to understand ADHD by emulating what its like. Jo gives Karolee an article to read with headphones that play rock music on and her kids distracting her. Karolee feels for Kahlin and fails to describe the article. Jo explains that Kahlin does not feel in control.
Jo tackles homework by creating a peaceful space for Kahlin, Jay playing with the other kids in another room. If Kahlin is to become frustrated, or loses interest, that Karolee should get Kahlin back to homework by having a positive attitude. Karolee starts off on the wrong foot, and Jo corrects her pessimistic tone while having Karolee get a pencil. Kahlin successfully does his homework, getting distracted along the way, but Jo teaches Karolee how to give lots of praise for good work so Kahlin can feel confident. Homework only took 20 minutes total. Karolee is amazed and shocked.
Jo visits Jay as he comes home, and expects more from him and Jo lets him know that he should spend more time with the family as a father. Jay does make an effort, but Karolee is still stressed out, so Jay has to be sensitive to his wife's feelings. Karolee isn't in the mood, but Jo says that she should give Jay a chance to talk to her. Jay & Karolee are open with each other, Karolee stating that she has buried a lot of her feelings but that Jo has exposed them in a head-on way. Jo once again tells Jay that he is expected to support the family and step up as a father, not just as the breadwinner worker of the family, because Karolee can't and shouldn't parent alone. Jay realizes that he needs to help himself when it comes to parenting. Jo wants to see more family nourishment.
Jo introduces a technique to help with snack battles. Jo shows Jars, one for each kid, and a choice of two snacks for each snack, along with a controlled routine for snacks, to make sure the kids aren't begging for more. When the kids want a snack they will go to their individual jar. The adults help the kids get involved and have them decorate the boxes. The kids will now be able to choose what they want to eat, and keep Mom from struggling emotionally.
As Jo leaves, Karolee is worried most about Kahlin's behavior. Jo is curious how the relationship between Kahlin and Karolee will continue.
DVD Meeting & Parent Evaluation[]
The first clip is about Jay supporting his wife. Jay shows support to his wife, and Karolee demands that he quickly change because Karolee needs a break as she is not feeling particularly well. As Karolee waits, Jay once again fails to commit to Karolee by wasting 45 minutes upstairs. Karolee is upset about the situation. Jo points out that Karolee was clear in her instructions, and that Jay should follow through with it. Jay says that Karolee should take a nap before Jay gets a chance to go upstairs, but Jo sees that Jay would prefer that because Karolee is scared that Jay won't return from upstairs when he goes to change. Jo says that Jay fails to understand how hard Karolee has it as a mother, and that Jay needs to be more productive and responsible.
The second clip is about homework. Kahlin and Karolee work well to complete homework, with Karolee giving positive praise to Kahlin. Jo compliments the praise Karolee gave and that it will help Karolee's relationship because Kahlin now enjoys her presence.
The next clip continues the relationship between Kahlin and Karolee, Kahlin gets angry over snack time, and Karolee puts him in timeout and a battle ensues on the naughty bench, Kahlin hitting Karolee, Karolee angry with him. The fight continues, and Karolee is enraged. Jo reminds Karolee about how Kahlin is feeling with his ADHD. Karolee knew snack time would be an issue, but Jo states that she has to show Kahlin that in order to resolve the situation, the best course of action is to talk it out. Jo reminds both parents that changing the way both of them behave, and to put their own feelings aside because the anger Kahlin and his ADHD was never his choice, so he needs love and compassion. Karolee recognizes her mistakes.
Reinforcement[]
Jo wants Karolee to be more sympathetic towards Kahlin, so Jo puts up a picture of Kahlin and asks Karolee to write positive things about Kahlin to move her away from the negative interactions she has with him. Karolee feels that this will help her deal with Kahlin in a better way. Jo says that this helps Karolee detach emotionally, so she doesn't take anything personally.
Jo wants to Karolee to be less stressed out, so Jo invents a chef game for the two young boys in the family, with the help of mom and dad so they can have fun. Friends of the family are invited over, and everything goes smoothly, allowing them to enjoy their time together. Pizza was served for everyone. Jo thinks Mom will realize that she can have fun parenting unlike her initial impressions during the observation.
Before Jo left, there was one issue left to tackle. Jo needed to show Jay what mom goes through do every day. Jo has said it over and over to Jay, but Jay needs to feel it to really get the message. Jo pulls out Karolee's "heavy weight" and has Jay carry it all in a backpack. The backpack is tightened and Jay finds it strenuous and quite an un-enjoyable experience while walking around the house. Jo says that this will likely give Jay more empathy towards Karolee's situation, so he can be more supportive of her. While Jay is annoyed by it at first, he does realize that Karolee has it bad enough as it is.
Jo leaves the Goins Family. Both parents realize how helpful she really is. Jo says she has equipped Jay with the skills to support his wife & Karolee's ability to deal with Kahlin's ADHD, and hopes that parents with kids that do have ADHD can achieve the same thing.
Family Update[]
Jay believes it will be less stressful to play with the children when traveling. Duck Duck Goose is played. Karolee enjoys being a mom because she can tell how parenting can be fun and how to make it that way. Both parents feel more confident. Karolee has more understanding of Kahlin as a person, and that by not giving up, she can make things much, much better for her family every single day.
Family Members[]
| Person | Age | Relation to Family |
|---|---|---|
| Jay Goins | 30 | Father |
| Karolee Goins | 29 | Mother |
| Khalin | 6 | Son |
| Kolben | 5 | |
| Kadance | 2 | Daughter |
| The child was disciplined via one of Jo Frost's techniques, but not in a way that she approved of. |
Gallery[]
Trivia[]
- This is the only episode to take place in Utah.
- There was a part where the children were playing with toy trains. Although, it's unknown what brand they were.
- Jo did not approve of Karolee putting Khalin in timeout but this can be seen as hypocritical as she has put Rhys from The Howat Family although he was diagnosed before filming.
- In the first thumbnail on YouTube, Jo was at The McAfee Family's house (which was the episode before this) instead of The Goins Family's house for some reason.
Behind The Scenes[]
This was filmed in December 2006.
Special Needs[]
- Khalin - ADHD
Events Post-Episode[]
- Karolee was 2 months pregnant in this episode. She gave birth to a baby boy named Kyson Goins on July 19, 2007.
- Karolee became a dental hygienist.
External Links[]
- Full Episode on YouTube
- Full Episode (Complete) on YouTube
| Season 3 |
|---|
| The Bowersock Family • The Weinstein Family • The Fager Family • The Swanson Family • The Mihalik Family • The Smith Family • The Haines Family • The Nitti Family • The Bruno Family • The McAfee Family • The Goins Family • The Williams Family • The Walker Family • The Cantoni Family • The Amouri Family |